Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom – Film Review

If Jurassic World really were a theme park, it’s grand opening couldn’t have gone any better. A visually dazzling, exhilaratingly dangerous thrill ride, the de-extincted franchise rocked and rumbled audiences off their seats – only for them to dust themselves off and line-up for another go around to the tune of more than $1.5 billion worldwide. But with unprecedented success comes T-Rex-sized expectations for Fallen Kingdom to not only match its predecessor’s savvy, ridiculous fun, but throw a whole new set of dizzying, terrifically enjoyable attractions into the mix. And that’s a challenge far easier said than done – just as the filmmakers behind The Lost World and III.

At the very least, Fallen Kingdom succeeds where those maligned sequels faltered, with screenwriters Colin Trevorrow and Derek Connolly delivering a compelling motivation for their heroes to return to the land of marauding dinosaurs. Isla Neblar’s no-longer-dormant volcano is a ticking time bomb, forcing the park’s former operations managed-turned-dino activist Claire (Howard) and beefcake trainer Owen on a mission to rescue a handful of species, including Owen’s beloved Blue, before the lava starts to flow.

While the crunched, twisted ruins of Isla Neblar remain a breathtaking sight, the Island-set sequences stomp a little too close to the dinos-chasing-people tropes of the rest of the franchise. The Impossible’s A. J. Bayona (who replaces Trevorrow in the director’s chair) unleashes a series of thunderously intense set-pieces – the highlight being a clawingly claustrophobic underwater scene; but we’ve seen unsuspecting visitors fleeing a thunderous stampede, braving uncomfortably close encounters with toothy reptiles, or getting trapped in a gyrosphere in previous movies. The plot hardly attempts to subvert expectations, either, with a clunky script that telegraphs its twists far too heavily for impact – it’ll surprise no-one to learn that the ruthless mercenaries hired to assist the evac have less than noble intentions.

Even when the movie switches the action to the sprawling, spooky Lockwood Estate, it still feels like it’s going through the same motions. Bayona does more fine work, returning to the haunted house-stylings of his debut The Orphanage to orchestrate plenty of beautifully crafted scares as InGen’s latest gene-spliced plaything, the Indoraptor, breaks loose and starts prowling the mansion for prey. But again, the sight of humans cowering in the dark as a set of flared, scaly nostrils and a spiky grin hove into view is hardly unfamiliar. It feels like Bayona has merely renamed the ride and slapped on a fresh coat of paint, while the carriage still travels along the same old predictable track.

Such a lack of invention might hardly be noticeable, were we invested in the fates of any of the characters. While Claire and Owen are more rounded and have far more chemistry this time out, Justice Smith’s nervy tech nerd and Daniella Pineda’s feminist paleoveterinarian barely register, and one character’s mysterious identity is too heavily foreshadowed to truly surprise. Meanwhile, Rafe Spall’s sneaky assistant, Ted Levine’s snarling trophy collector, and Toby Jones’ Trump-esque auctioneer are so cartoonishly hissable, it’s difficult to take seriously the film’s darker themes about animal testing and mankind’s responsibility to other life on this planet.

Ultimately, then, Fallen Kingdom is little more than a well-crafted collection of fun, shiny set-pieces, but with little emotional tissue to bind them into a satisfying experience. With the story left tantalising poised on the cusp of a brave new Jurassic world, further instalments are seemingly inevitable; but on the basis of this so-so adventure, the question is: will anyone be back for another ride?

Runtime: 128 minutes (approx.)

Director: A. J. Bayona

Screenwriters: Colin Trevorrow, Derek Donnolly

Stars: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Rafe Spall, Ted Levine

Swallows and Amazons – Film Review

Arthur Ransome’s 1930 classic Swallows and Amazons is a wistful tribute to youth’s intrepid spirit. Written before thoughts of a second world war even seemed possible, the novel harks back to those halcyon British summers where children camped under the stars, sailed great lakes and grazed knees weren’t just a Pokémon Go-related injury. But while this second cinematic adaptation – following 1974’s similarly sedate attempt – adds some sleuthing hijinks to the faithfully transcribed charm and endeavour, it struggles to raise the stakes enough to really set pulses racing.

The story chronicles the summer holiday adventures of the Walker children – John, Susan, Tatty and Roger – as they set sail in their dingy named Swallow to make camp on a small island in the middle of the Lake District. When they arrive they find two girls, Nancy and Peggy Blackett, aka the Amazons, have already established a fort and a battle commences to decide who will keep the island. Meanwhile, the Blackett’s reclusive Uncle Jim Turner (Rafe Spall) hides on a houseboat as a pair of dastardly spooks, played by Andrew Scott and Dan Skinner, attempt to steal his secrets.

For a film that sets itself out as a call to return to a time before health and safety went mad – let the children play with knives and matches, for goodness sake! – it’s somewhat ironic that it falters precisely because it plays things too safe. Dropping a basket of sandwiches into the lake is about as close to disaster as the Walker children get in this cosy rather than exciting tale – but don’t worry, they manage to save Mrs Jackson’s fruitcake.

Director Philippa Lowthorpe and screenwriter Abigail Gibb try to inject some much needed peril into proceedings with an espionage-themed subplot – inspired by Ransome’s real-life escapades as an MI6 agent – but even that is handled too tamely to really build any momentum in the story. The mysteries are blown too quickly, the conflicts are resolved too easily, and for all the scrapes the children get themselves into you never doubt that they’ll make it home in time for tea by the end.

Lowthorpe directs with plenty of warmth and wit – the expansive Lake District setting is as breathtaking as you could possibly hope for – and the entire cast put in solid performances, especially the underused pairing of Jessica Hynes and Harry Enfield as a dyed-in-the-wool b’n’b owner and her grumpily mischievous husband. It’s just a shame Lowthorpe doesn’t attempt to challenge the audience with anything more dangerous than soggy sarnies. The result is a quaint, confident, quintessentially British slice of frivolity. Basically, it’s Bake Off: The Movie.

Runtime: 97 mins; Genre: Adventure; Released: 19 August 2016;

Director: Philippa Lowthorpe; Writers: Andrea Gibb, Arthur Ransome;

Cast: Jessica Hynes, Andrew Scott, Harry Enfield, Rafe Spall